We’ve all experienced the “self-sabotage” that sometimes occurs when we outwardly say we want something – whether it’s to lose weight or change careers. But, then sometimes, our actions don’t match that declaration. Why do we resist something we say we want?
The reason can be explained in very simplistic terms by acknowledging at the most basic level that we all have both a conscious and a sub-conscious mind. Our conscious mind contains the thoughts we are aware, or conscious, of. The sub-conscious mind is like the auto-pilot of our belief systems gained through authority figures, parents, teachers and events we’ve “learned from” in the past.
Resistance is basically our sub-conscious mind trying to protect us. The job of the sub-conscious mind is to look for danger and keep us from doing things that it perceives might harm us.
What does resistance look like? Pretty much doing anything and everything except what we say we want to do or accomplish. Sometimes the subconscious can come up with some pretty great arguments about why we’re doing all these other things as well. These “stories” we tell ourselves can keep us stuck for a really long time – some people stay stuck in these narratives their whole lives. If you’re reading this you probably don’t want to be one of them.
Very often when we hit resistance, there is an underlying belief or fear that is stopping us from moving forward. When this happens, ask yourself “what fear or belief is driving this”? What am I afraid might happen if I continue forward in this way? Continue asking “Why”” or “And then what?” until you get to the core fear or belief driving your resistance.
Hypnosis is a great way to get you into a relaxed state where you can easily access your inner conscious. From there it becomes much easier to find the original event that created the fear and erase it. Please know that I am not referring to stage hypnosis where people cluck like chickens. I am referring to consulting hypnosis by trained professionals that adhere to ethical standards, with the intention of helping people overcome limiting beliefs and habits. Please go to a professional organization such as the National Guild of Hypnotists (http://ngh.net/) to find a reputable practitioner.
Another method is to write down any beliefs or fears you are experiencing and reframe them to something more positive. You can even use a visual of moving that belief or thought to the back of your mind where it is less accessible. Then visualize placing the more supporting thought in the front of your mind where you can access it more easily.